The Intenders Newsletter
Table of Contents
~Commiserating - An All Too Common Occurrence
~The Unintentional INTENDER
~The Intention Process DVD
~Upcoming Intenders Workshops
~Personal Counseling with Tina
~A Heartfelt Note of Gratitude for Your Donations
Commiserating - An All Too Common Occurrence
Almost daily now, we are faced with the issue of how to deal with
the challenges our friends are going through. How do we handle
these situations and stay uplifted ourselves? How do we steer clear
of the swamplands of negativity and remain steadfast in our
integrity so we can set an example for others in these times of
great change? The Law of Agreement: A Laymen's Guide for Taking
Your Power Back addresses the subject of Commiseration and how you
can approach this all too common occurrence when it comes your way.
Here is an excerpt:
"Commiseration is another kind of agreement that is so subtle that
we can be up to our neck in it before we realize what's happening.
You know how it goes: someone starts complaining about something,
and you find yourself agreeing with them - and even, perhaps,
telling a story about how you've had some of the same sort of
problems they're talking about. On the surface it seems harmless
enough, but underlying it all is the reinforcement of situations
that really don't do anybody any good. It's just another way we
Oftentimes, when people are looking for someone to commiserate with
them they have a vested interest in their suffering. They don't
really want to change; they're seeking validation for their
problems; they're looking to keep things the way they are, instead
of getting better. They want to continue to receive the money, the
medicines, the perks, or the attention that they've become
accustomed to receiving.
That's how we can tell the difference between commiseration and
compassion. The person who evokes our compassion is truly suffering
and looking for a way out of it. The person who wants you to
commiserate with them is usually protecting the status quo. It is
for us to discern which is which by checking in with our feelings.
Compassion elicits a feeling of love and empathy toward the
sufferer, while commiseration leaves us feeling down and asking
ourselves why we felt we had to add to another's problems (and our
own) by agreeing with them.
I was having coffee this morning with my buddy, Jason, and before
we even got into how we were going to approach our day's work, he
started grumbling about how the money was short, the customers
didn't appreciate him, and how his back hurt all the time. Then he
went into a rant about the doctors and how they put pins into his
back 10 years ago - and almost before I knew it, I was telling him
about my own history of back problems. I started describing how my
injury occurred, about the same time as his - and then I caught
myself - and I stopped in mid sentence . . .
Knowing that my thoughts and my words are creating my future, why
would I want to be agreeing with him around a subject that was apt
to bring both of us more pain? It made no sense. If my intention is
to be in agreement with him, wouldn't it be better to rally around
a subject that is more positive and productive? Wouldn't it be
better to dwell on things that are apt to bring us more happiness,
comfort, peace, or abundance?
From that moment on, I've stayed more alert and aware to what I'm
saying. And anytime Jason goes back into his stance of wanting me
to commiserate with him, I switch the subject to something more
positive. I'm not sure how long it will take him to catch on, but,
for me, I begin to feel better the minute I stop commiserating."
In the moment we change a habit pattern
we also raise our consciousness
The Unintentional INTENDER
We heard the following story from Carolyn Richardson at book
signing in Boulder, Colorado a few years ago. Recently she wrote us
again, saying that there was an update to it. It is so much fun
that we thought you'd enjoy it and we thank you, Carolyn, for
sharing it with our readers.
"Several years ago, when my son, Chris, was in college and living
in a dorm, he and some of his teammates began talking about sharing
a house off campus the next semester. But at the time Chris' only
mode of transportation was his bike, which was fine for getting
around campus, but would not cut it for getting across town in a
hurry or in bad weather, which Lincoln, Nebraska has plenty of.
The more the plans came together, the more passionate he became
about wanting to make the move from the dorm to the house. The
money that was now paying for the dorm could easily pay for the
rent. But he knew that there was one big obstacle to overcome
before he could commit to signing a lease - that of needing a car.
Being a student with no money, the outlook was pretty bleak. And
Chris knew that we couldn't help him because I was in real need of
a "new" car myself and beyond that, most of our available funds
were going towards his tuition.
Meanwhile, I had found a car that fit my needs and was the right price - cheap!
The day after I sealed the deal on my car, while talking to my
brother who lives 1,200 miles away, I mentioned that I had been
looking for a car and had just found one. He said, "Well, I have
Mom's car sitting here and it's not getting used. You could have
had that." (A year before this, my mother had entered an assisted
living residence and her nice, low mileage Oldsmobile was now
sitting in my brother's driveway.) I said, "Well, it's too late for
me, but maybe Chris will want it."
I immediately called him and asked, "Chris, how would you like to
have Grandma's car?"
There was such a long, dead silence on the phone that I thought
maybe we had lost the connection. So I asked, "Are you there,
Chris?" After another shorter silence he replied a slow, drawn
out... "Yeah?"... with a distinct inflection of a question at the
end. Then, slowly, with more than a hint of disbelief in his voice,
he said, "I have to tell you.... and he proceeded to relay his
situation and the events of the evening before. Chris said, "I have
a special place in a park where I go to be alone with my thoughts.
And last night while I sat there in the dark, thinking about how
much I wanted to move into the house with the guys, I got so
frustrated that I yelled, "I WANT A CAR!"
After a few seconds I repeated, "So....do you want Grandma's car?"
His answer came, this time without hesitation or question, "YES!"
Post script : About five years later.
The next time that Chris used Intention, it was quite intentional.
After two and a half years of volunteer coaching at his alma mater,
the University of Nebraska, and working a hardware store job to pay
the rent, he decided it was time to get on with his career. So, he
quit his job and spent the summer traveling around the country
interviewing for available coaching positions. Not too
surprisingly, nothing came from his efforts that summer, because
all the time he was interviewing, he had this nagging desire to
stay close to his friends and the place he had called home for
almost eight years. (Okay, so I guess it was still unintentional.
By now he had run out of money and was desperate. So, with the only
alternative being that of returning to his old job, which he hated,
one morning Chris looked at himself in the mirror, and out loud and
with great conviction, said to the Chris in the mirror, "I want a
paid coaching job!!"
THAT AFTERNOON he got a call from one of his former coaches at the
University of Nebraska, who was now at the University of Nebraska
at Omaha, 50 miles away. "Chris, how would you like to be my
Assistant Coach?", he asked. "The Head Coach here at UNO just
retired, unexpectedly. So, now I'm the Head Coach and I need an
This coach knew Chris. He knew what he had accomplished in his
college career and what he was capable of. And he already knew what
a good coach Chris was. No Interview Needed!! And to top it off,
Chris would not be moving far away from his friends and his
familiar part of the country.
He got everything that he really wanted!!
The Intention Process DVD
Hardly a day goes by without someone calling us and asking us how
we run our Intenders Circle. Long ago, we learned that a picture is
worth a thousand words, so we filmed our Intention Process DVD with
the strong intention that it would show anyone how to easily set up
and run an Intenders Circle of their own. These Circles make it
easy for the individual to state their intentions in a relaxed,
comfortable, supportive environment, and, in this way, they begin
to get proficient at manifesting and become empowered.
If you are looking to create a group of your own and become more
adept at using the Laws of Manifestation, what better way than to
do it in a group of like minded friends who are also becoming more
empowered. There IS strength in numbers, and it IS easier to manifest
when you have several others who are also envisioning your
intentions being manifested. That's what The Intention process DVD
is all about. We take you right into an Intenders Circle so you can see
for yourself how it is done.
To order your copy of The Intention Process DVD for $14.95, Click Here, then Scroll Down
Upcoming Intenders Workshops
April 14 - Ft. Smith, AR - Potluck at 6pm, Workshop 7 to 9 - East
Meets West Martial Arts and Healing Center - 5300 Hwy 64 E / Alma
Highway - Van Buren, AR - Contact Genn at 479-675-6203 or
April 20 - Park City (SLC), UT - 6:30 to 9 pm - The Market Hall,
1680 East Ute Blvd, Park City, UT 94098 - Call Tom at 435-659-4196
or Kurt at 801-509-2829
Personal Counseling with Tina
One of our main purposes for making our inspiring On the Road with
The Code 2 DVD set was to share Tina and Lee Ching with you. You
see, we were blessed to have her loving guidance from the beginning
of The Intenders, however we always felt that the world would be a
better place if more of you found out about her and her gifts.
Accordingly, since the DVD came out, people from all over the world
are now seeing Tina bring through Lee Ching, and as a result she
is getting more private readings than ever before. If you would
like to talk with Lee Ching personally, you can call Tina at
808-982-6774 (she typically receives a donation of from $50 to
$200, and please keep in mind that it is several hours earlier
where she lives in Hawaii.)
A Heartfelt Note of Gratitude for Your Donations
We would like to extend a heartfelt note of gratitude to all of you
who rallied to tithe the money for printing The Intenders Handbook
and The Law of Agreement. We received amounts ranging from $10 to
$250 from people all across the world, accompanied by notes of
appreciation for our providing our Intenders Bridge and The Code
for free and for keeping our books and DVDs at prices that are
easily affordable to anyone.
To Make a Donation,
We're almost there! Just as soon as we reach our goal, we will reprint The Intenders
Handbook which means that, thanks to you, our Create Your Own
Community Package will be available again soon. This Package has
helped thousands of people in these times when it is so important
for us to come together in community.
Click here and Scroll to bottom of Our SECURE Shopping Cart.
WE INTEND THAT WE ARE ALL LIVING OUR CALLING
AND DOING WHAT WE CAME HERE TO DO!
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